“Say you don’t need no diamond ring
And I’ll be satisfied
Tell me that you want those kind of things
That money just can’t buy
I don’t care too much for money
For money can’t buy me love.”-The Beatles
Keep your cash & show your love
Do you have a full heart but an empty bank account? Despite what the media wants us to believe, true love doesn’t come from a store. Maybe it’s time to jump off of the consumer-driven love-train and endeavor to show your love to that special someone in other (free) ways. Here are ten ways you can show your love, without spending a dime.
Are you familiar with The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman? In case you forgot (or have never heard of them) they are:
- Words of Affirmation
- Acts of Service
- Quality Time
- Physical Touch
- Receiving Gifts
If you take a closer look at the five love languages, you’ll notice that four out of five of them are entirely free. In fact, all of them can be satisfied without cash if you are creative with your gift-giving. (This is really good news to us frugal folks!)
Knowing the five love languages is great. But how can we put them into practice? Here are ten tangible things you can do to show your love to someone. Did I mention they’re free?
10 Ways to Show your Love to Someone: Without Spending a Dime
1.Talk to them. There’s no need to be all mushy and gushy with your words. Just be sure to have regular (sometimes meaningful) conversations with someone you love. While you are talking with them, make sure you compliment them on their appearance or something they do that makes you happy. Be sure to offer words of encouragement to the people you love. If someone you love tells you they want to become a rock star, tell them, “Great, I’ve always wanted to be a groupie!”
Asking questions is also a great way to show your love to someone. When you inquire what someone else thinks, you are telling that person that you value their opinion and that you trust them to make the right decisions when necessary.
Many people falsely believe that “words of affirmation” is a love language strictly for women. This is simply not true. I don’t know a single man who doesn’t like to be told he matters. Do you?
2. Listen to them. Ever had a conversation with someone you love about a topic you are completely uninterested in? How much of the dialogue do you actually remember? Usually, when we are “listening” to another person ramble on about something we couldn’t give two flips about, our eyes glaze over, and our mind starts to wander. We’d rather be anywhere but there and it shows.
The next time someone you love starts chattering on about what they had for lunch on Friday, or that time they forgot to floss, push all other distractions out of your mind and focus on the person in front of you. Stop what you are doing, put down the phone, turn off the tv, and listen. Don’t just pretend to be listening by muttering the occasional “Uh huh.” Truly listen to what they have to say. Make a point to respond to them in a positive way so they know you hear them. And, don’t forget to smile, no one can talk forever!
3. Respect them. Recognize and appreciate that your loved ones may have different ideas, habits, and idiosyncrasies than you do. Understand that while you may not always agree with someone, you should always be considerate and respectful of them. Never, ever assume that your significant other feels the same way you do about anything! Instead, be mindful and ask him/her what they are thinking. Their answer may surprise you.
Don’t forget your manners. So often, we become complacent in our relationships with the people we love and we forget how important it is to simply be polite to one another. As a result, we disrespect the people we love when we forget to use words like “Please”, “Thank you”, “I’m sorry”, “Excuse me”, and (most importantly), “I love you”.
4. Touch them. Never underestimate the power of touch. From the moment we are born we crave the touch of others. A simple hug can brighten an otherwise dark day. Other ways you can physically connect with someone (outside of sexual contact) is to hold hands, give a massage, stroke or brush their hair, tickle them, give them a pat on the back (literally). And, most importantly, don’t forget to take the time to snuggle on a regular basis.
5. Do stuff with them. Another great way to show someone you love them is by choosing to spend your time with them. Remember, “quality time” is a love language. You don’t have to spend any money on this step, either. You can go for a walk together, play a board game, read to each other, join them in a project, dance with them, go for a bike ride, exercise with them. The possibilities are endless.
(Totally Free) Ways to Show Your Love to Someone
6. Be there for them. Sometimes, in order to show your love to someone, you may need to drop everything and simply be there for them. If you or someone you love has ever experienced the death of a loved one, you’ve learned first-hand that no words or kind deeds can soothe the pain. The one thing that does help, however, is knowing you are not alone. During times of suffering, we need to know we can count on someone to be there for us, to provide a shoulder to cry on and to come along side of us when life gets hard.
7. Do something nice for them. Again, you do not need to spend money to demonstrate your love. There are many acts of service that are entirely free. Here are some ideas to get you going:
- Prepare a meal for someone (and clean up afterward)
- Write a love letter (no need for a novel, a short note will do)
- Create a customized piece of art
- Pick them flowers (from a field, not your neighbor’s garden)
- Complete a chore for them (my love language is “clean my bathroom”)
- Wash their vehicle
- Let them pick the tv show or movie for the evening
- Offer to run errands with them
- Have a cup of coffee (or tea) waiting for them when they wake up
8. Look at them. I mean, really look at them. When they are speaking to you, give them your undivided attention. If you want to show your love to someone, make sure to notice them. When they walk into a room, smile, say “hello”, and make eye contact. If they do something to improve their appearance, compliment them.
9. Be honest with them. Nothing destroys love faster than a lie. If you really want to show your love to someone, make sure you are honest with them. Even little white lies, when compounded over time, can be toxic to a relationship. This doesn’t mean you have to be brutally honest, though. Before you speak, be sure your “honesty” is coming from a place of love, not anger or spite. If you are unsure, it’s best not to say anything at all.
“If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.”-Mark Twain
10. Give them their space. Let’s face it, even when we love someone, we all crave “alone time”. Therefore, sometimes the best way you can show your love to another person is simply to leave them alone. Arrange some time for them to be by themselves. This will give them the opportunity to “recharge their batteries” so the next time they see you, they will be refreshed and rejuvenated. It’s true what they say, absence really does make the heart grow fonder.
There you go, ten practical, very doable ways you can show your love without spending a dime. These ideas are not limited to a spouse or significant other, either. You can use these free ideas to show your love to your friends, family members, co-workers and your children, too. And, if you absolutely have to spend a little money, click below for some suggestions.
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